2 nights ago, I had a pretty lengthy discussion with Al Araf 7:7. At that time I feel like throwing the towel and just go on and live in isolation.
Al Araf 7:7 was all for it. I said I just go back to 2003 where I was completely immersed in my own thought. They strongly suggested for me to do so. No more Blogging. Just Evernote. Everybody agreed to it.
After all they said I had already collected my Hearts of Gold. I had achieved my goal with you and Els.
Luckily I snapped out of it the next day.
What I'm saying here Sarah is I'm going against the advice of Al Araf 7:7 by Blogging. I am overexposing myself by doing so. It is against conventional wisdom.
And yet, I cannot simply let go. I am hooked. Rightfully I should get on with my life.
The good thing is I know I cannot live without you. The bad news is I also know I cannot live without you.
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This was what I captured in Evernote
23/5/19
Today I am back to my normal self; a loner. None of the relationship I have is real. Els is a one way relationship and Sarah is behind the veil.
In the end I am responsible for my own line. Nothing matters than those things I set to do. Fuck! I cannot even have a normal relationship like everybody else.
I am glad I still have Al Araf 7:7
I got to stay focus come what may.
It's all about the neurotransmitters.
A warrior walks alone. Let's do away with chicks. Let's indulge is the Emperor's routine and the running. If I want to talk, I talk to myself in the Evernote.
Maybe this is a phase but I do feel the need to be alone.
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